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After fifty years as a psychologist and marriage counselor, I can tell you something about that fight. It is not that you fight too much. It is that the same fight never ends. It changes subject and comes back.
I call it the Couple’s Vicious Cycle. This book is not about changing your partner. It shows you how to find your own part in the cycle and change that part. You can do that whether or not your partner ever joins you.
Toward an Extraordinary Relationship: How to Break Painful Patterns, Stay True to Yourself and Create Wiser Love. By Dr. Diane Ernstoff Kramer, Psychologist and Marriage Counselor. Kindle and paperback.
Chapter 1 takes about twenty minutes to read. You will meet a couple whose fight looks a lot like yours, and you will see why it keeps coming back. The book itself is coming soon. Readers who have Chapter 1 will be the first to hear.
Ten short chapters. Each one ends with a few journal questions. You take one real moment from your relationship, the one you can picture right now, and carry it through the whole book. By the end, you can see the pattern, name your part, and choose differently.
The course follows the same path as the book, one screen at a time. You hear real conversations. You practice with guided audio and exercises. You write in a private journal that only you can see. Already have the book? The last page tells you where to start.
One question has followed me through fifty years of work. Why do some people stay caught in painful patterns, while others keep learning and build lives they love?
I started as a research psychologist. I taught for four decades in the State University of New York system. And for fifty years I sat with individuals, couples, and families as a psychologist and marriage counselor.
I have sat with this fight thousands of times in my office. I know where the exit is, and I can show you where to look for yours.
This book brings everything I learned to the one place where our unfinished business shows most clearly: the person we love. Fifty years in, I am still learning. I hope the book helps you see your own part of the pattern, and change it.
The core course is Awaken 8 Key Abilities for Your Extraordinary Future. It is built on the original Extraordinary Self Program, taught in person to thousands of people.
The online courses bring that program to you, at your own pace. Six more courses each go deeper into different parts of the Extraordinary Self 8 Key Abilities: relationships, stress, self-talk, self-confidence, self-defeating patterns, and emotional resilience.
Every course has guided audio visualizations, workbook pages, role models, practice exercises, and a private journal that only you can see. Every course comes with a thirty-day, full-refund guarantee.
This book grew out of those courses, fifty years of marriage counseling, personal experience and a career in research and teaching.
Therapists, counselors, and coaches: the book and the courses are designed to be used alongside your work with clients.
Why does such a small moment have so much power? Chapter 1 answers that, in about twenty minutes. Put your email below and I will send it to you.
P.S. If you are reading this late at night, after another one, I want to tell you something first. You are not crazy. The same fight really does keep coming back, and there is a reason. Chapter 1 shows you the reason. If it is not for you, you have lost twenty minutes. If it is, you will know by the second page.
Warmly, Dr. Diane
