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A dirty plate left on the counter. A silence that lasts all evening. An argument two people have had so many times that they both know what comes next.
Every couple has a version. For some it is the dishes or the money. For others it is sex, children, work, or how much time to spend together. Whatever it is for you, the problem is real.
After fifty years as a psychologist and marriage counselor, I can tell you something about that fight. It is not that you fight too much. It is that the same fight never ends. It comes back, whatever the subject.
I call it the Couple’s Vicious Cycle. This book is not about changing your partner. It shows you how to find your own part in the cycle and change that part. You can do that whether or not your partner ever joins you.
P.S. If you are reading this late at night, after another round of the same fight, I want to say one thing before you decide. The fight really does keep coming back, and there is a reason for it. Chapter 1 shows you the reason. If it turns out not to be your reason, you have spent twenty minutes. If it is, you will know by the second page.
Warmly, Dr. Diane